9-12-09 Why my step dad refuses to talk to me...

(Directly from my Journal. . . )
Today has sucked... So, I was watching a TV show called "The Vampire Diaries". I read the book two summers ago. It was a good book.

Anyways, There was a part on it that was bad, I had already seen it and that was the only bad part on that episode. Mom told me to turn it off. I tried explaining that that was only the bad part and that girl gets eaten, but she just kept quiet. Then, she told me to also take my clothes down stairs. Then, Steve flipped on me. I got up grabbed my clothes and ran down stairs. While I was going down I herd him yelling,
"AND YOU STILL DIDN'T TURN IT OFF! YOU KNOW KACEE YOU LISTEN ABOUT AS GOOD AND NOTHING!!!"
When I got in my room I cried and cried. I herd Steve yelling from upstairs, and I went and listened at the bottom of the stairs. He was talking about how I'm just a stupid teenager who only cares about myself and is a problem to him all the time. I walked up and mom saw me. She said,
"Don't worry Kacee every things fine." I said,
"No it's not..." and Steve yelled at me. I got sick of it and screamed,
"NO STEVE! YOU SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME!" he flipped. He was all up in my face pointing, and screaming telling me to never tell him to shut up that he was the adult. Then mom came between us and he stepped back. She was yelling, and he was yelling. They were arguing and to be honest I didn't know whose side mom was on. Then Grandma came in and yelled,
" Steve you should never be yelling at her like this, and do as I say no as I do does not apply!!! Kacee don't tell any grown up to shut up."
More yelling...
I went in my room and cried and cried. I herd Katie yelling. Steve said,
"I'm talking to your mom you stay out of this!!!" Katie said,
"No! You're talking about me therefore I'm in this too! ITS MY BUSINESS TOO!"
A little while later Katie came in my room and said,
"Kacee don't worry its not your fault. He is being an ass hole."
One thing he was yelling to my mom about was that all week I was out doing stuff, and not doing my chores. She flipped,
"Steve this week is homecoming there is activities all week long. She would call me and ask to stay at Jessica's so she didn't have to waste gas."
He said I was playing mind games to get her to say yes. She came unglued.
"I tell Kacee no all the time! She gave me the choice she said mom I can ride the bus home or stay at Jessica's so we don't waste gas. SHE LEFT IT UP TO ME!"

And just all this crap... Here's the real story:
A while ago Steve flipped out at me telling me that going to friends houses was wasting gas. So, instead I just started going to their houses right after school, and shill there til whatever activity I was going to started. Then, he complained about me not getting my chores done because I was at friends houses. Okay? So, I now have to ride the bus home, do my chores, then walk nine miles back to Nephi so I get my chores done and not waste gas? Or just not have any friends so he gets his way?

My mom was like,
"So, now they can't go to friends houses because you don't want to allow it? There only allowed to hang out one night a week because you have to have your way?!"
And you want to know what makes me angry? I listen to Steve's crap 24'7, but never does Kacee get to add how she feels about ht situation. Kacee's just a stupid 14 year old teenager who is brainless, and just a pain in Steve's life. Kacee's opinion doesn't matter and never will... ever. So, because Kacee's existence on earth is pointless she has to listen and do everything Steve says because he is the adult and I'm just the stupid teenager.

Steve always has to get his way because he is the man of the house, the "dad", and he knows best. He doesn't know whats best, he can't control his temper, and he is NOT my dad.
Wasn't it just a couple months ago that he told me he was sick and tired of trying to be a dad to me? That he would never do anything for me again, and the only reason he was staying was for my mom and little brother? When mom and him were telling she said,
"Steve you've already told those girls you don't want to be around them, so why are you still here? If you're going to treat them like this than just leave. They've already been through this... Don't put them through this again."

A while back we visited Colorado and Steve's mom was telling me the Steve calls and complains all the time about me. Then, she realized the glare I gave her and she covered it up by saying...
"Uh... but he sure loves you..." Wow. Am I really that bad?